I've Noticed My Mom Talks Alot - January 13, 1992

So yesterday I made a big deal about 10-year-old Audra taking time off from journaling. That is a lie! Sort of. I forgot that before I found the Snoopy diary I found four pieces of paper that were torn out of a spiral notebook with all sorts of "observations." These pages are dated January 13-15, 1992--during the Snoopy diary gap period.

I must have recently read Harriet the Spy in school and was attempting to emulate Harriet and her spy notebook.

Influential book

I remember it was one of those instances where the teacher let you choose any book you wanted to do a big report on. Our library had three copies of Harriet. I grabbed one off the shelf and started looking at it. Shortly after, two girls came over and picked up the other copies. I don't remember if they said it or if I just assumed it, but they wanted to read the same book so they could copy the assignment from me. I remember thinking our teacher wasn't that dumb. Sure. Maybe two identical reports could go unnoticed. But three? No way! Luckily our teacher encouraged them to find something else. Ethical dilemma averted.

Anyway, like Harriet, little Audra used a notebook to write down some pretty nasty things about the people in her life. Unlike Harriet, nobody but Audra ever read these observations. Well, until now...

Jan 13 1992

My Name is Audra S this is my notebook. I've noticed my mom talks alot. Charles is my brother. he is very easy to get mad at. He bugs me everyday. My mom doesn't do anything about it. Tonight we went to Ponderosa for dinner. "Now lets talk" is one phrase I would like to hear from my mom. She babys Charles. She does puzzles with him plays games with him, and does alot more things. She seems to never have time for me though. When I ask her to play a game with me or do a puzzle or even just talk, she always "no" in a very mean way. Sometimes I want a sister or a different brother. I even think I would like a whole new family!

It's weird. I think that if I wear my clothes to bed, I feel better in the morning. Going back to my brother. He can get on your nerves alot. (I'll get back to that!) My school has horribal lunches except the pizza and nachos. Today I felt sick. I don't know why, but I did. In my class I have alot of friends. I never want to have a best friend though because if I did, my other friends will get mad if I spend more time with someone else. That's my opinion. Tomorrow I will try to observe the kids at my bus stop. I have to keep this book to myself. Looking back to my bus stop there is me Audra, ____, ____, ____, ____, ____ (I think that's how you spell it) ____, ____, ____, ____ and ____.  My bus is 309. My school is Thomas Hart Benton. I will try to write in this notebook every day!

Audra S age 10

A good intro to the spying that is sure to come. Lots of misspellings, sibling rivalry, pining for more attention from my single parent/working mother, wanting a whole new family, "horribal" lunches, and a ton of kids to judge at the bus stop. On this first page, in the upper left corner, I printed "origanol" and underlined it three times. I must have been worried about forgeries. And in the upper right corner I wrote my full name and drew a wavy line under my last name to highlight its awesomeness.

That bit about not wanting a best friend was crap. Judging from this journal entry, nobody would be my best friend because I wore my clothes to bed and was walking around feeling vaguely sick half the time. Kids invited me to sleepovers and parties and stuff, but I was too obsessed with trying to get my mom to play with me and ignore my brother that I couldn't afford to spend time with my peers.

This explains so much.