5th Grade Yearbook

I know there are a few of you who have read this blog regularly. Thank you. I appreciate your time and interest. Some of you have asked who **** is and I haven't been very forthcoming. We are now more than halfway through the Snoopy diary and I'm surprised I haven't spilled the beans yet. :) Diary entries will resume tomorrow.

For now, enjoy the cover of my 5th grade yearbook and the pictures of the kids in my class, AKA a bunch of mother fucking assholes. If you really want to figure out who **** is, consider this another clue. Wink.

Front Cover

My class. 

Bridging The Gap - Part 2

Yesterday's post had pictures from July through August 1992. Fall is in the air and school is about to start again. Little Audra is in 6th grade, still at Thomas Hart Benton elementary school. The next entry in the Snoopy diary is dated March 2, 1993. The photo album I've been mining stops at Christmas 1992, and so does this blog post.

Halloween 1992. We had accumulated some random masks over the years, including this granny one. The other elements of my costume were found around the house.

Granny mask + house coat + bandana + cowboy hat+ umbrella-serving-as-cane = best costume ever!

Going trick or treating with my cousin, chaperoned by my uncle.

In the top photo I am clutching my back as if I am in pain. Because that was part of my character. Duh. But my favorite part of my costume, best seen in the second photo, is how I chose to wear my glasses on the outside of the mask. Haha. FYI...my uncle is a very talented pumpkin carver.

November 1992.

Hooray for grassy, leafy November snow!

Standing on top of a crate demonstrating my awesome Nerf Master Blaster skills.

My one and only orchestra concert. I'm not sure when this took place, as none of the photos were dated, but the garland and bows scream Christmastime.

Faking it.

I didn't stay in orchestra very long (only a few of months) because I strongly disliked the teacher, but I think I also quit because a lot of the other kids quit. Peer pressure or whatever. Dumb move. My violin didn't have the fine tuners at the bridge, and it was very difficult for me to tune it properly using the pegs, so my teacher said he would tune it. However, he mistuned it. There was a lot of chaos before the concert and I guess he wasn't paying attention when he had my violin. This became apparent immediately into the first song and I decided rather than sounding like an idiot who can't play her her instrument, I would be better off not playing. So I mimed it. I never forgave that teacher for such a humiliating moment. Instead, I quit.

Christmas 1992. 

Opening gifts. 

I was totally surprised.

I had been bugging my mom about getting my own CD player for a long time. She was in control of the stereo in the living room that had a CD player and wouldn't let us play our music as often as we would have liked. In the top picture I'm showing off my swag which included a book or calendar of antique maps, the Annie Lenox "Diva" CD, a Troll jigsaw puzzle and some MadLibs. I remember thinking "gee, thanks for the CD, mom, but you'll never let me listen to it." and then bam! She shocks me with the most unexpected Christmas present ever: a CD boombox. I was truly surprised, which didn't happen very often, because I always made it my mission to figure out what our mom was getting us. My record would never be perfect. Good one, mom! 

Bridging The Gap - Part 1

The last diary entry I posted on the blog is dated July 11, 1992. Little Audra didn't write again until March 2, 1993. Eight months of life not documented in the Snoopy diary. I know you're crushed. Here are some photos to help bridge the gap.

July 1992. We return to Kansas City after visiting our father in Phoenix for a few weeks.

Our arrival at the KC airport.

Our "Welcome Home" cake.

Some "Welcome Home" goodies on my bed.

Apparently my brother and I coordinated outfits so we wouldn't lose each other on the plane or in the airport. Ha. I don't think that's true, but I do think it's funny that we match. Too bad he wasn't into jean shorts like I was. Please take as much time as you need to digest all the glory of my childhood bedroom.

August 1992. Transitioning back to regular life and hanging out with my extended family.

Having way too much fun at our grandma's house.

We sang our hearts out. With only one microphone.

Slumber party with the cousins. Sweet 90210 nightgown.

My birthday at the end of August 1992. I turned 11. Sadly, I didn't invite any boys.

Some of my guests.

Simpsons candles!

The Worlds of Fun birthday crew.

I remember the two friends I invited (girl standing next to me and girl squatting in front) didn't get along very well. It kind of made the night not so much fun for me, which partly explains my facial expression.

The diary entries will resume shortly...

I Ate A Lot Of Pizza - July 11, 1992

Day: July 11, 1992 Sat.   Date:    


Today we cleaned the house. After that we went to Susannes' and Alex's house. Alex is only 3 1/2 I think. He's really cute. We stayed over there along time. We swam for a while after that we went back and played. Then around 5:30 we went to Peter Pipers. I ate a lot of pizza. 


After that we went to a park. It was fun. I played in the sand more tworads the time to leave. Dad and I built a big volcano type thing and after a while I jumped on it. It was fun. I want to wright more but I can't.


Audra S age 10 going to be 11 soon and going into 6th grade

Susanne was our father's girlfriend at the time. I vaguely remember her. I can picture the park we played at with more clarity than her or her son's face.

Peter Piper Pizza was my favorite place to eat when we visited Arizona. I was so happy to find Peter Piper in Albuquerque when we moved here. The pizza is good and they have an arcade. I want to go there right now.

Today We Went To Mexico - July 5th 1992

Day: July 5th 1992 Sun.  Date:   


On Friday we didn't go to the summer camp. What we did on Friday was packing. We left in the afternoon for Tucson. We stayed in a hotel called Best Western's Inn Suites. The pool was grosse! It gave us free breakfast. We played tennis last night and lost two balls. We had to pay for them. But we didn't. Our dad bought a new can and gave them two and we kept 1. Then today we went to Mexico. You have to know how to bargin or your going to loose all your money. I bought a bracelet and a pair of earrings for mom. One of the earrings has a piece of the blue stuff missing. We just looked mostly in Mexico. It's funny in a way. The store owners kept lowering down the prices even if we were just looking at it. When we left the store they keept lowering the price. It was funny.


Tonight mom called. She asked what we did over the weekend. I told her. I also told her about the earring, the store keepers, how poor people are there, and stuff about how many paco's are equal to a dollar. She told us the all the Childrens Palaces allover Independence and Kansas City were going out of business. We talked about some other things too. But I won't write everything in. She said that she hasn't gotten the past 2 postcards I've sent. That seemed strange to me. 


She told me that there were two big storms. Yesterday and today. I told her it was dry out here. Well I could write on and on but I won't. Oh yah, one thing. I lost a tooth! I'm done. I miss mom I want to come home. I better stop now. I'll write more tomorrow.


Audra S age 10 going into 6th grade

As much as I hated visiting my father, it's obvious that I got something out of the trips. This time I got to experience the luxury of a Best Western in Tucson, engaged in some creative problem solving (the lost tennis balls), was exposed to Mexico and its culture, and learned about bargaining and currency exchange. That's a pretty enriching weekend.

No clue if my mom still has the earrings, but I still have the bracelet. It didn't age very well. Maybe it just needs a good polishing?

Children's Palace was a chain of toy stores.

Understatement of the summer: "I told her it was dry out here."

Raise your hand if you think my father did the tooth fairy thing for me?

Our Father Made A So Called "Compromise" - June 16, 1992

Day: June 16, 1992 TUES.  Date:   


Today mom called and I talked to her. I cried on the phone as usual.


This evening just a few min. ago our father made a so called "compromise." It said that we would stay home the rest of the week then the next 3 weeks we would have to go to the summer program. We started our talk around 9:00 PM and it ended at about 10:00 PM. It was so stupid we talked about stupid shit that had nothing to do with the summer program or staying home. 


I wish I was at home with mommy now. I'm realy homesick. If I even think about her my temples start hurting or I cry or I get misty eyed. I have to go to bed now.


Audra S
age 10
going into 6th
grade

I love that I used ironic quotes at age 10. Favorite sentence: "It was so stupid we talked about stupid shit that had nothing to do with the summer program or staying home." I can imagine all of the eye rolling and dramatic sighing I did during that hour. 

I hope my mom reads this and cries. Hahaha...no I don't. But I don't think she ever believed we hated these summer visits as much as we said we did. Take that, Mom! Just kidding. (Seriously, please don't call me crying about this. I survived and turned into a fairly well-adjusted adult. Well, except for the fact that I'm unemployed, 30 years old, and exploiting my childhood thoughts on a blog because I'm bored and crave attention.)

Our Father Is Stupid - June 15, 1992

This is the first of four entries during the summer before 6th grade. My brother and I are visiting our father in Phoenix, AZ for a few weeks. IN THE SUMMER. It was hot. And we were never that excited to go see our father anyway. People acted like we were going on vacation, but that's not how we felt. I'm glad I took this diary with me. These next four entries will give you a tiny glimpse of our summer "vacations."

Day: June 15, 1992 Mon  Date:   


Today Charles and I stayed home alone together. We had to because our father didn't have a certain thing for our forms to the day camp. I want to come home more than than anything in the world! I hate visiting our father because we have to go to the same kind boring thing here like we do at home. I cry every night. Our father is stupid it's only Monday and he said that today was the last day this week I could call mom. There's still Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday left. Mom probably won't call very often. I only have 5 more things to write her now because I wrote her a postcard today. I wish I was at home now and never had to come here again!


Audra S age 10
going into 6th grade

I like the part where I write out the remaining days of the week. Kind of reminds me of that one part of this infectious song.

So we'd have to spend a few weeks in Phoenix every summer per the divorce decree. It wasn't easy for me, my brother or our father (I assume). It was hot as balls, our father didn't know how to deal with his children, and these summer camps were an unwanted form of babysitting (according to my brother and me). We were glad to stay home alone, I'm sure, even though our father's house was the least kid-friendly place on the planet. No tv, no games--except Monopoly, and no junk food. We didn't know any of the kids at these camps and were so shy and uncomfortable that we just counted the hours and days until we could go home. To KC. I did learn how to play Stratego at one of the camps and colored in a lot of Highlights Magazine hidden pictures with a very nice old lady at another. One year he sent us to a place full of more affluent children where I got tennis lessons and they had a whole room full of Nintendos. My brother and I both hated swimming, which meant we sat around doing nothing for 2/3 of the time at these day camps. When it's 110 degrees outside, most people go to the pool. Not Charles and me!

Imagine that smiling sun burning your flesh in the desert while you hear the other children laughing and playing.